Wednesday, January 11, 2006

A matter of skin

I suppose I'm still in the phase "know me better", explaining myself, giving some context. Here it goes a bit more of me, have pity..

I'll write here something I don't tell to anybody. Since I was young, a teenager, I suffer from an acute case of acne. So strong it is, that I have concealed from anyone else since those times. Of course I interact with people, I'm probably seen as a more or less normal person, though a bit of a loner, but heck, they probably say, he's harmless. I don't have much acne in my face, when I'm dressed you can't notice anything particular. The worst of my problem is in my back and torax. This has prevented me to undress in front of anyone, and gradually, it has moved from a physical problem to a more psychological problem. I'm always afraid that people invite me to go swimming, or to the beach, or to some activity that involve taking my t-shirt. The consecuence of this is that it adds up in a negative way to the social inabilities that I always had.

I grew up in a city whose main business is the beach, in a country where the only thing that people do in summer, in the vacations, is to spend the whole day in the beach. Can you imagine the number of excuses I had to invent to avoid the perpetual invitations to "go to the beach"? Fucking words, how I hate them!

I have grown so used to this that I cannot put in words how much this problem has screwed me. But it has colaborated in great and permanent ways to my self steem (refer to the previous posts). It is probably not so uncommon, but I never met anyone with the severity of my symptons. Can you believe I'm more than thirty years old and I still have acne?!?

Well, many missing points, still, to explain, but I got tired. One funny image at the end, though: do you rememeber the "never nude" character of Tobias in Arrested Development?